HAHA!

How To Save A Life (The Fray)

Step one you say we need to talk
He walks you say sit down it’s just a talk
He smiles politely back at you
You stare politely right on through
Some sort of window to your right
As he goes left and you stay right
Between the lines of fear and blame
And you begin to wonder why you came

Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life

Let him know that you know best
Cause after all you do know best
Try to slip past his defense
Without granting innocence
Lay down a list of what is wrong
The things you’ve told him all along
And pray to God he hears you

Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life

As he begins to raise his voice
You lower yours and grant him one last choice
Drive until you lose the road
Or break with the ones you’ve followed
He will do one of two things
He will admit to everything
Or he’ll say he’s just not the same
And you’ll begin to wonder why you came

Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life



i would hav stayed up wit you all nite..
how slow time is now..

the calm b4 the storm..

missing you..

missing you all..

i was nv good at say wat i reali feel.. so here is another song..

F..



Pink Floyd
Wish You Were Here


So, so you think you can tell
Heaven from Hell
Blue skies from pain
Can you tell a green field
From a cold steel rail
A smile from a veil
Do you think you can tell
Did they get you to trade
Your heroes for ghosts
Hot ashes for trees
Hot air for a cool breeze
Cold comfort for change
Did you exchange
A walk on part in the war
For a lead role in a cage

How I wish
How I wish you were here
We're just two lost souls swimming in a fish bowl
Year after year
Running over the same old ground
What have we found
The same old fears
Wish you were here





wish i cld sing beta.. ahaha =P

*wish you were here*

What It's Like (Everlast)

We've all seen the man at the liquor store beggin' for your change The hair on his face is dirty, dread-locked, and full of mange He asks a man for what he could spare, with shame in his eyes "Get a job you fucking slob," is all he replies God forbid you ever had to walk a mile in his shoes 'Cause then you really might know what it's like to sing the blues Then you really might know what it's like Then you really might know what it's like Then you really might know what's it like Mary got pregnant from a kid named Tom that said he was in love He said, "Don't worry about a thing, baby doll I'm the man you've been dreaming of." But 3 months later he say he won't date her or return her calls And she swear, "God damn, if I find that man I'm cuttin' off his balls." And then she heads for the clinic and She gets some static walking through the door They call her a killer, and they call her a sinner And they call her a whore God forbid you ever had to walk a mile in her shoes 'Cause then you really might know what it's like to have to choose Then you really might know what it's like Then you really might know what it's like Then you really might know what's it like Bridge I've seen a rich man beg I've seen a good man sin I've seen a tough man cry I've seen a loser win And a sad man grin I heard an honest man lie I've seen the good side of bad And the downside of up And everything between I licked the silver spoon Drank from the golden cup And smoked the finest green I stroked the fattest dimes at least a couple of times Before I broke their heart You know where it ends, yo, it usually depends on where you start I knew this kid named Max Who used to get fat stacks out on the corner with drugs He liked to hang out late He liked to get shit-faced and keep the pace with thugs Until late one night there was a big gun fight and Max lost his head He pulled out his chrome 45, talked some shit, and wound up dead Now his wife and his kids are caught in the midst of all of this pain You know it comes that way At least that's what they say when you play the game God forbid you ever had to wake up to hear the news 'Cause then you really might know what it's like to have to lose Then you really might know what it's like Then you really might know what it's like Yeah then you really might know what's it like To have the blues

ouch man.. found this song tt i heard b4.. juz nv paid attention 2 it.. it's kinda thru ya?
looking into my past man..

gotta try slp earlier

haiz*

i noe i shld be thankful..

i shld be happy..

there was a boy in a desert, who stumbled across a barrel of water.
he sat down by it, realizing he wuz thirsty, an started drinking.

satisfied, he looked ard, an saw a little bud growing, an felt lyk he shld water it, an so he did.

a mongoose came over as well, an found relief in the boy's barrel of water.

his best fren came over to, of whom they shared everything, an soon sat by him..

soon the barrel was running dry..

then they both started talking..

regreting all tt sharing..

was it all worth it?

was it worth it 2 be so nice?


as time shortens, it slows down.. you just try 2 grab on to overything.. u want it 2 drag.. u want everything..

but they dun call it the sands of time for nothing, u can never hold on 2 it..

i'll miss all of you.. Sulyn, Ian, Qin, family, church peeps, old frens, Randall, all who i hav been able to talk 2 cuz i'm stuck at home.

dear.. i promise you, we'll get thru it ya?

*LUL, XXXXOOXXOOXOOOOXXXXXX*

ever.

it's cool 2 be depressed.. i wanna be depressed.. hahaha

ok scrape tt.. this is a nice song from my early teenage years.. ahaha..

Adema - Giving In

Will you walk me,
To the edge again?
Shaking, lonely, and I am drinking again
Woke up tonight and no one's here with me
I'm giving in to you

Take me under,
I'm giving in to you
I'm dying tonight,
I'm giving in to you
Watch me crumble,
I'm giving in to you
I'm crying tonight,
I'm giving in to you

Caught up in life,
Losing all my friends,
Family has tried to heal all my addictions,
Tragic it seems to be alone again
I'm giving in to you

Take me under,
I'm giving in to you
I'm dying tonight,
I'm giving in to you
Watch me crumble,
I'm giving in to you
I'm crying tonight,
I'm giving in to you

I look forward to dying tonight,
Drink 'till I'm myself, life's harder every day,
The stress has got me,
I'm giving in..
Giving in!
Giving in, NO!

Take me under,
(I'm killing all the pain.)
I'm dying tonight,
(I'm sick of all that faith)
Watch me crumble,
(I'm killing all the pain.)
I'm crying tonight,
I'm giving in to you

Take me under,
I'm giving in to you
I'm dying tonight,
I'm giving in to you
Watch me crumble,
I'm giving in to you
I'm crying tonight,
I'm giving in to you
Take me under,
I'm giving in to you
I'm dying tonight,
I'm giving in to you


those days seem so near yet so far away.. lyk alot of things happen in between liddat.. hahaha.. =) kinda miss those days now.. hahaha..

other songs i wuz into last time.. an picking up again:

1. Chevelle - The Red
2. Breaking Benjamin - Polyamourous
3. Korn - Freak On A Leash
4. Finch - What It Is To Burn
5. Story Of The Year - Until The Day I Die
6. RATM - Wake Up, Bullet In The Head, Testify (alot la)
7. AFI - This Celluloid Dream, Girls Not Grey
8. Orgy - Blue Monday, Fiction (Dreams In Digital)

and many more.. hahaa check them out.. they're reali not bad..

i'm unlocking my past metalhead.. Wahahahaha.. =)

Jimi Hendrix Lyrics - Little Wing

Well, she's walking through the clouds
With a circus mind,
That's running wild.
Butterflies and zebras and moonbeams
And fairytales,

That's all she ever thinks about ...

Riding with the wind.

When I'm sad, she comes to me
With a thousand smiles
She gives to me free.

It's alright, she says,
It's alright;
Take anything you want from me,
Anything.

Fly on, little wing.


been hearing old sch stuff.. an this song is nice! mayb exp the corrs version, too.. erm.. irish? hahaha

mite detail my current playlist soon..


it's coming closer..

feeling shittier..

p.s. where's the hater on my tagboard? hahaha!

nice song, but once again, another self parody moment.

maple rocks!

i have ventured the maplesphere and came back wit picture postcards of my quest!









sure beats actaully playing tt game.. hahahaha!

sat down in the living room today at abt 6.

chronicled the setting sun in my mind.

felt myself fade away to the ghost i once was.

i swear i could almost see thru my arm.

i'm fading.

i'm not addicted to aniting..

juz to the feeling of escapism.

this is wat drives me..

how did a weird song go from.

this





to..



oh well.. nid slp.. an sumting beta 2 do.. hahahaha!

... ian ur lecturer mite be right aft all.. hahaha..

IS BATMAN GAY?

o_O?! i wanna play drums in a wookie suit 2.. ok wait no i wan d stormtropper shit.. hahahaha =P

bored

Ananova:

'Green' arms giant's lead-free bullets

A British arms giant is planning a new range of 'environmentally friendly' weapons - including lead-free bullets.

BAE Systems says it wants to design bullets without lead because it 'can harm the environment and pose a risk to people'.

The company also aims to make 'quieter' warheads to cut noise pollution and 'eco-friendly' rockets, reports The Sun.

Scientists are also working on bio-degradable explosives and grenades that produce less harmful smoke.

BAE director Dr Debbie Allen said: "Weapons are going to be used, and when they are we try to make them as safe to the user as possible to limit the collateral damage.

"We also try to impact as little as possible on the environment."

But Campaign Against Arms Trade spokesman Symon Hill said: "This is laughable. They make weapons to kill people. It's utterly ridiculous."

08:19 Monday 18th September 2006


1 mth att c.. mayb out of brave.. weird news..

do i ruin tings?

booking in.. again..

head's in a mess..

going in too fast.. haiz*

hate my life

hate booking in.. totally.. counting down is painful..

missing it all alreadi..

national day..

doesn't mean much 2 me exp a break.. hahaha..

saw this episode of band of brothers tt wuz shown in camp today titled
'why we fight', which juz showed d allies finding out abt the concentration camps.

d most memorable scene to me wuz actually the starting part, as in the song where they showed the old foto like ting...

it made me wonder..

to all you ppl out there tt belive tt war and armed conflict is glorious and heroic, and are willing to rush out at "the press of a button", let me ask u..

how would u feel going off to a foreign land to fight, for God noes how long, knowing full well tt u may never return, and even if you did, tt there would be no1 left around waiting for u?

can u honestly sat u can look a man square in the eye and shoot him dead? can you fight on when side by side ur frens die by u in a mess of blood and flying body parts?

are we all prepared for tt?

let ur imagination run wild.

why do we fight?

cuz we have orders to kill the ememy, while the 'ememy' has orders to kill their enemy, and all fighting carry the hope of going baq to the lives they lived before, for the people who pray for their safety everyday.

so let's tink logically and fairly, who rightfully deserves to die? whose side the evil one?

all must suffer cuz 2 people can't agree..

is it reali for our best interests?

i reali dun wanna be a part of this..

i'm not prepared.

sum fighting soldier huh?

how doi start

how do i tell u gow i feel, knowing how bad u alreadi do?
cause seriously, i noe how u feel TOTALLY.

i guess what hope i had last week has faded into confusion. don't wanna blame ani1, but all i can say is tt i'll juz have 2 do my best an c how it goes from there.

i realise tt i don't pray tt much animore, i mostly concentrate my feelings into a thick mass an fire it skywad to Heaven, while listening out for the soft thud of Someone bigger an greater than everything around me, catching it like a tennis ball thrown in his direction.

it reali sucks to feel helpless, like when i realised tt u were suffering yest an i could do nth but just start to pray. worry for you combined wit dread for myself as a silent superstition tt belives tt events will turn out the opposite of what i which for most of the time. 2ce i felt lyk drowning last nite. one when i showered, and the moment the water hit me, my lungs contracted an for the next 20 sec, breathing wuz shit. next came in a vague dream that i wuz drowning in my blanket, and had to constantly rise for oxygen.

whatever tt means.

i can't help it, i still want u to enjoy urself more than me.

happy army stories are hard to come by, and onli for the reali crazy or reali luckly ppl.

i am neither.

so i will have to do what i can.

25/7/06
2.30 p.m.


=) thanks for the weekend.

it sucks everytime i book in

i noe i'll b out again tml.. but tt still freaking leaves lyk monday till sat again.. so irritating la...


haiz*

miss myself being not ard..

it's lyk i come out.. and fade into non-existance again.. evry weekday.. juz phase out..

haiz* evryday i'm home feels lyk a weekend..

miss all..

miss u..

sulyn.. have fun ya??


take care in camp!!!! noe u'll do great. =)

wat is loneliness?
i guess it's tt weird feeling tt u get when u juz miss company. when 5 sec ago life seemed so hectic, and conversation so fluid. but soon aft it juz dies down into nothingness.

some ppl choose to attemp to jolt life back into the situation, to maybe make a phone call or sumting.. but mayb im a sadist, but i wanna sit this one out, in all it's gripping crushing darkness tt ebbs and flows ard me, to c wat it does to me, an mayb describe it.

like waiting till ur eyes adjust to the darknes of the night. seems tt darkness is something tt is pervading into my life more and more. but i dun fear it. it covers me, and hides the scary stuff from my eyes, which mayb a good ting.

i guess part of me feeling shitting is the fact tt i could be come doing beta tings wit my life then jus wasting my time eating mush witcool manes, i hate it here sometimes, esp when i'm alone, but it reali depends on my mood. i guess it gets worse when nitefalls, it's juz bad i guess.

weirdly, i can feel tt way on weekday aftnoons, esp when i'mat home alone. or anitime is good 2. mayb it' juz me feeling sian at being denies at wat i wanna do.

so i guess, mayb i can never be satisfied.

tinking leaves more qns than ans

writen on 13/7/06
8p.m. in Bravo Bunk


sian!!! booking in again!!!! still feels shitty!!!!! =P

missing evryting.. an worried abt d future. *haiz*

=)

last day of my status at home..

guess no matter wat happens.. i'm still an army boy..

back to the routine..

seemed kinda ironic tt i juz watched a show on a max security prison..

an there u live by a set of rules.. of respect.. blah blah blah..

sian.. sounds not 2 diff frm army..

kept saying tt in there time is in limbo.. tt evrydae is the same..

freak! isn't tt juz lyk NS?!

my time out wuz lyk.. limbo in limbo..

evrydae juz stay home.. then lyk dunno wat dae is wat.. cuz no diff..

get calls to check on me an shit.. can't move ard v much..

but screw tt.. i wld never give wat i had this week..

never.

living a week on stolen time.

euphoric.

wun bored wit details..

i'll juz explain it in colours..

juz wave aft wave of swirly happiness..

now darkening again..

a week of sloth an gluttony..

slipped lyk sand thru my fingers..

i guess i wld feel beta abt wat is coming if i actually knew wat is ahead..

i guess i juz have 2 c wat is unrevelled b4 me..




it's so hard not 2 hope..

cuz i dun wanna be dissappointed.

why?

haiz* tings feel kinda uncertain now.. cuz lyk i'm lyk now in limbo over my injury an stuff.. but haiz*

guess it's all up 2 d big guy above ya? hahaha =)

feel scared but yet.. juz noe tt we'll make it thru..

guess we can't hold on to the past.. an it seems lyk we're being dragged forward..

yeah we're both bummed out.. but haiz* =)

we're covered.. we juz gotta learn to rise above the trials ya?

it's crazy i noe. but yeah..

*WINKS*

here's a dedication again!

You'll Be Safe Here

Rivermaya

Nobody knows
Just why we're here
Could it be fate
Or random circumstance
At the right place
At the right time
Two roads intertwine

And if the universe conspired
To meld our lives
To make us
Fuel and fire
Then know
Where ever you will be
So too shall I be

Chorus:

Close your eyes
Dry your tears
'Coz when nothing seems clear
You'll be safe here

From the sheer weight
Of your doubts and fears
Weary heart
You'll be safe here

Remember how we laughed
Until we cried
At the most stupid things
Like we were so high
But love was all that we were on
We belong

And though the world would
Never understand
This unlikely union
And why it still stands
Someday we will be set free.
Pray and believe

Chorus:

When the light disappears
And when this world's insincere
You'll be safe here
When nobody hears you scream
I'll scream with you
You'll be safe here

Save your eyes
From your tears
When everything's unclear
You'll be safe here

From the sheer weight
Of your doubts and fears
Wounded heart

When the light disappears
And when this world's insincere
You'll be safe here

When nobody hears you scream
I'll scream with you
You'll be safe here

In my arms
Through the long cold night
Sleep tight
You'll be safe here

When no one understands
I'll believe
You'll be safe,
You'll be safe
You'll be safe here
Put your heart in my hands
You'll be safe here

argh.

hmmm sumtimes it's hard 2 sae wat i reali feel.. so i guess i shld juz make a dedication...

here's 2 u.. =)

Easy Tonight

You were wrong
You were right
And you are gone Tonight
You were free So alive
You were wrong You were right

And you were down
You could see
And you wore hearts for me
And you were sharp Sharp as knives
You were wrong You were right

Shot down said you never had the chance
Took a ride on a suicide romance
Could have sworn there was somebody home
To facilitate the great unknown
Oh woman, I ain't going to meet you anywhere
Dont know where Im going yet,
But I sure am getting there

Shotgun fire anybody home
I got two dimes in the telephone
Alright?
No, It's not easy tonight

Shotgun fire anybody home
I got two dimes in the telephone
Alright?
No, It's not easy tonight

You were bound You were free
You wear black for me
You were dark As Dark as night
You were wrong Yet you were right

Shot down said you never had the chance
Took a ride on a suicide romance
Could have sworn there was somebody home
To facilitate the great unknown
Oh woman, I ain't going to meet you anywhere
Dont know where Im going yet, no
But I sure am getting there

Shotgun fire anybody home
I got two dimes in the telephone
Alright?
No, It's not easy tonight

Shotgun fire anybody home
I got two dimes in the telephone
Alright?
No, It's not easy tonight

She's In over my head
And it's not easy, it's not easy tonight

She's In over my head
And it's not easy, its not easy tonight

Shotgun fire anybody home
I got two dimes in the telephone
Alright?
No It's not easy tonight

Shotgun fire anybody home
I got two dimes in the telephone
Alright? Yeah!

You were free Now your not
You were free babe 

haiz*

an then there is silence..

juz silence..

it's crushing..

vast an pitch black..

no sound of my tears..

tho they pour..

i miss u..

i miss the light..

*have fun where u are*

got posting.. a combat engineer.. doing bridging.. ah..

confusion , fear an excitement combined..

haiz* dunno how it's gonna turn out..

but i guess it's all i God's hands rite?

noe it's gonna b ok..

hmmm sulyn's in china.. hope she's fine..

no matter wat happens.. i stil miss her.. alot..

hope she'll b fine. an i noe she'll have alot of fun.. hahaha

juz hoping an praying..

hope tings turn out good..

=)

hello from the airport! hahahahah


going hanoi for a few days.. hahaha aq on the 14th of march..

will miss evry1.. an will try 2 get stuff ya? hahaha


sulyn: miss u damn alot!!! take care k? will be back soon


free internet is so cool.. heeee!

who r we?

an what do we have?

that leaves us to wit an extremity of emotions..

swinging back n forth..

leaving us giddy and in a massive whirlpool of rage and euphoria

a mixture that beats special k..

is this for the best?

i don't know..

is this what shld be done?

i don't know..

d future is a darkness..

pop in 3 days..


seems so fast..

time reali flies..

have i grown?

hmmmmm


step forward into another unknown..

but i noe i'm covered..

hope i stay d same.. hope i stay sane.. hehe..

hope i grow wit sulyn..

=P

*big hug*

ah!!! finished live range.. passed.. now 2 an a half more weeks til lit's all over.. haiz..

it's good..

3 mths of my 2 yr service completing..

no love 4 it yet..

uni admissions came in.. gotta tink abt tt..


sulyn: dear, do wat u feel wat is ur heart's desire rite? i promise i will support u ani an evrywae i can.. do well babe! *muacks*

still miss her evrytime i go in..

looking at her face

ignites a warmth in my heart

her every action

obviliates my sorrow.

tho times we thirst for blood,

it's a small step of growth.

quirky is wat i describe us to be

but ah! just mite do a tom cruise

mad with elation.

this is only the beginning.

ahhhhh..

hee!

watched da vinci.. hmmm i juz wanna sae.. it doesnt strike me as much a stab in my faith..

all i'm going 2 show is this.. this more or less sums up wat i belive.

i belive, all other facts r secondary.

if we wld juz question ourselves, "does it REALLY matter?"

cuz ultimately, its fiction.

---

Apostles' Creed

1. I believe in God the Father, Almighty, Maker of heaven and earth:

2. And in Jesus Christ, his only begotten Son, our Lord:

3. Who was conceived by the Holy Ghost, born of the Virgin Mary:

4. Suffered under Pontius Pilate; was crucified, dead and buried: He descended into hell:

5. The third day he rose again from the dead:

6. He ascended into heaven, and sits at the right hand of God the Father Almighty:

7. From thence he shall come to judge the living and the dead:

8. I believe in the Holy Ghost:

9. I believe in the holy catholic* church: the communion of saints:

10. The forgiveness of sins:

1l. The resurrection of the body:

12. And the life everlasting. Amen.

*tt signifies the unified church of Jesus, not the Catholics, mind u.. hahaha

find it sad tt most christians haven't heard or use this, it's a useful ting. hahaha

take care ppl..

as quickly as i exit the island

i prepare to enter it.

the feeing is the same..

a desire to escape it..

companionship can never compare to freedom..

of which i will easily trade.

tears that fall evrytime..

trickle to form a river

that dwarfs the nile..

that is the depth of longing..

that is the extend of my love..

*to my tokyo destroyer*

hey dear. cun get ur blog to load properly..

so i guess i'll do a tag here..

dis week has been totally great.. d weekend i mean.. hahaha but yeah..

still.. it rocked in everyway la..

time reali flies..

i noe it flies till i go baq in again.. but then.. it'll fly to when i get out.. an eventually..

till i finish dis shit.. hahahahaha


wheee!!!!!

so happy wit us..


p.s. i got into arts an soci!

an m totally touched by ur post.. *muacks*

baq from field camp!!!

wheee.. i made it..



we made it!!!

feel nice..


feel lyk i've grow..

but i dunno.. hahaha

still big sized tho.. din lose weight at all..

so.. wat's d diff..

but i guess..

i felt shitty abt leaving.. i noe now we can do this..

sulyn? we'll do well!

more than ever.. we'll do exceedingly well!

both got places in uni.. an yeah..

we rock!

not reali clear cuz i'm sleepy.. but yeah.. noe it's juz another step..

not onli forward, but also up..

I LOVE U CHENG SULYN!

THANK YOU GOD!

not reali tinking much else.. so i guess i shld quote from a book i'm reading, which is reali good!

i think prime numbers are like life. they are very logical but you could never work out the rules, even if you spent all your time thinking about them
-the curious incident of the dog in the night time


*happy, estatic*

in the 1st day of field camp.. i wore gloves.

those half finger kinds tt linger tightly over..

gave me a feeling tt someone was holding my hands all d time..

protectiing me from the muck.


it rained..


hard.

the gloves got wet.


an then i could not wear them animore.

damn i miss u babe.. i reali reali reali do..

i love u cheng sulyn..

with all of my heart..

as i go thru everything..

it's so bloody shitty..

i miss u so damn much babe..

hope 2 see you soon..

i love you.

hey...


baq out an in again....



so weird.. sounds so wrong..

but haiz*
when i go in.. friday is field camp..

gonna b so sian..

half excited.. half dread..

i dun wanna book in.. hahaha wish i had all d time in d world again..

but i guess.. time has 2 move on

tings have 2 change.. we have 2 do tings we dun wanna do..
gonna pick up my socks soon.. an wear my uniform again..

wit tears in my eyes..

i carry wit me in my heart
you inside
to look 2 when i feel lonely
to return 2 ur room when i need 2

i walk wit heavy steps,
cuz it's d tension
of me being pulled
away from you.

the string never snaps,
time clicks on,
an on.

on again.

i hate this life
of desires detained

i miss you badly.


God, i miss her so much..
it hurts so much..
but i noe u have us both in ur hand..
help me..
help her..
help us..

amen.

haiz*

going in again..

went 2 another church 2dae..

i hate booking in.. this weekend was juz sad..

comeout at 3.. going in at 730..

so freaking fast!


wanted 2 blog last week.. but mom kept turning off d internet..

i miss my old life..

never like uniform groups..

never belived in d cause i'm supposed 2 fight 4..

now i hav no choice..

tried 2 slp.. close my eyes an kept seeing ur face..

then i told myself.. i reali need u..

can't fight baq tears..

missing u so bad..

guess d song i posted reali means somthing..

love u CHENG SULYN!

i'll get strong.. an we'll make it thru.. *MUACKS*

Run

by Snow Patrol

I'll sing it one last time for you
Then we really have to go
You've been the only thing that's right
In all I've done

And I can barely look at you
But every single time I do
I know we'll make it any where
Away from here

Light up, light up
As if you have a choice
Even if you can not hear my voice
I'll be right beside you dear

Louder, Louder
And we'll run for our lives
I can hardly speak I understand
Why you can't raise your voice to say

To think i might not see those eyes
Makes it so hard not to cry
And as we say our long goodbyes
I nearly do

Light up, light up
As if you have a choice
Even if you can not hear my voice
I'll be right beside you dear

Louder, Louder
And we'll run for our lives
I can hardly speak I understand
Why you can't raise your voice to say

Slower, slower
We don't have time for that
All I want's to find an easier way
To get out of our little heads

Have heart, my dear
We're bound to be afraid
Even if its just for a few days
Making up for all this mess

Light up, light up
As if you have a choice
Even if you can not hear my voice
I'll be right beside you dear 

army has been both sian an fun at d same time.. hahaha going in soon.. still tinking it's a dream.. but oh well.. we all have to adapt..

thnx everyone.. God, Sulyn, Eddie, Yuqin, Hp an My Family..

i'll make it thru

we'll make it thru

*wink*

haiz*

thus alreadi..

going in on sat..

it's reali the end of my holiday..


d best i've ever had..


ever..

cuz most of it wuz spent with the person i care abt the most..

so i guess.. we're all moving forward.. weather we want to or not..
i still wish there wuz an escape, tt this holiday would never end..

but i guess all good tings muz come to an end rite?

i can assure you this dear,

u will alwaes b on my mind.. thru evryting..

evryting we did will b replaying over an over again in my head.

an tt will keep me going..

knowing tt u r outthere waiting 4 me..

CHENG SULYN!

tt means the most to me..

i guess from now on we'll all move on.. as this is a crossroad tt we both muz take seprate paths, 4 the 1st time we have diff agendas,

but i noe we'll stick by each other.. an i'm sure we'll go into a deeper level than ever before!

as i go into army..

i promise i will continue to be you pillar of strength, and help u all i can.. i'll try an understand wat u r going thru, and support u any way i can..

half of me wishes tt we weren't together so there will be no pain..

but how can i even think tt? considering the 1 yr an 5 mths tt we spent together.. all d joy..

ian is right..

i have some1 waiting 4 me as i go in..

an ultimately.. i count myself blessed beyond comprehension..

we'll make it thru this sulyn dear..

this is my promise 2 you..

we'll make it work.. no matter wat!

*love you so much it hurts 2*

waring.. gushy post.. so.. 2 bad!

wahaha sulyn made it thru her project an got transfered! so freaking powerful...

*congrats baby!!*

ok. she never uses frenster animore.. an i guess this is a much beta means 2 write something abt her than that..

well.. she has done a totally great job at d st aerospace place, so much so tt she has been offered 2 stay an go 2 finance..

i mean.. WOW!

super proud.. i mean.. on her 1st office job.. starting work frm 745 and lyk.. nv leaving on d set time.. always doing at least 1 hr of overtime.. i mean... she saes it's abt d money.. but reali.. tt takes a freaking load of stamina.. totally rocks darling..

she has done wat many ppl wld die 2 look upon.. freaking ot till 1015 pm la! wat the heck.. gotta gif it up 4 her.. on top of tt, still able 2 put up wit my stupid moods, even more stupid ppl in d office (P*SSY LUCY) , still make frens, still make plans 4 d future..

wit the plan 2 go set up a child care centre (wuz silent on d fone cuz i wuz in amazement), details even.. still plan a great v'dae dinner.. tho it got cancelled by work.. but then again.. tt's all while in d office, an without ANY complains frm any staff.. tt is ultimate multitasking.. even tho she has not much interest in wat i do.. she still supposrts me d best she can.. i onli hope i do the same..

i guess there comes a time when we gif it up 4 someone who has done reali reali reali reali reali well.. an this is d time..

super excited 2 meet her tml.. super excited 2 hear her voice o the fone evrydae, super excited 2 sae, this is my girlfriend,

Cheng Sulyn, 16 mths together an still going strong, to call her my 'gf' will do injustice 2 her.

love you so so so much dear..

happy belated valentine's!

you have done so well!!!!

*MANY MANY HUGS & KISSES*

wa lau! there's no more mcspicy double in mac! it's juz a single patty tt is claimed 2 b thicker an jucier.. wth man...

seriously.. i dun understand y wit more competition coming up serving bigger burgers, macs has 2 constantly cut corners an shrink their food while raising prices..tt's even more reason not 2 go macs.. hell it's not even real meat u're paying 4.. mos has reali small burgers.. but teriyaki burger is lyk.. u can c a real chicken part! not sum solidified freeze dried mush or chicken waste parts...

qin is rite.. d 30 bucks u pay 4 billy bombers can buy u 15 mcchickens, but d amt of real meat u eat is lyk.. not there at all!

(chicken nuggets are solidified chicken bone an feather parts mixed wit flavouring)

so oh well..


Carls Jr. evry1! rocks


top tings of d week

1. meeting sulyn (time is of d essence girl! *hugs* hahaha)
2. learning DOTA ( i stil hav d most death counts)
3. getting d drum pad.. ( can play drum at nite now!)

of cuz d getting money from red packets is alwaes good la.. hahaah but onli annually.. hahaa


wuz tinking..

do ppl feel lonely, when they are alone? when they shop an walk ard by themselves?

how many ppl r there out there.. feeling lonely..

2 b lonely even in a crowd.. or even amoung frens.. cuz we're all isolated in a bubble of personal space... an secrets..

mayb we all are lonely.. juz varying in diff amts.. an diff thresholds 2 bear it..

i guess.. we all die alone rite?

says much abt how much we nid God..

heard frm ps king tt ppl hate silance, cuz it makes them noe they're alone, then they think.. of evryting..

i'm curious 2 noe how much this is an extent in society.. but then.. hahaha scared i do a bloody poe an become a monomaniac.. ahahah wat the..

oh well..

*CNY is a time 2 take money!*

well.. sulyn's at work now.. dunno when i'll b able 2 c her again..

i miss her alot.. dunno how 2 reali sae this out.. but i guess this can apply 4 her work an later when i go army... hahaha

enjoy baby.. i mean when i sae..

Here Without You

by 3 Doors Down

A hundred days have made me older
Since the last time that I saw your pretty face
A thousand laughs have made me colder
And I don’t think I can look at this the same
But all the miles that separate
They disappear now when I’m dreaming of your face

I’m here without you baby
But you're still on my lonely mind
I think about you baby
And I dream about you all the time
I’m here without you baby
But you're still with me in my dreams
And tonight
It’s only you and me

The miles just keep rolling
As the people leave their way to say hello
I've heard this life is overrated
But I hope that it gets better as we go

I’m here without you baby
But you're still on my lonely mind
I think about you baby
And I dream about you all the time
I’m here without you baby
You're still with me in my dreams
And tonight girl
It’s only you and me

Everything I know
And anywhere I go
It gets hard but it won’t take away my love
And when the last one falls
When it’s all said and done
It gets hard but it won’t take away my love

I’m here without you baby
But you're still on my lonely mind
I think about you baby
And I dream about you all the time
I’m here without you baby
But you're still with me in my dreams
And tonight girl
It’s only you and me

i juz noe u're doing well.. an constantly praying 4 ur safety..
=) we'll meet again soon!

i
miss
you
!

wow.. qin's going in tml at 2 pm.. sulyn got a job, passed basic driving alreadi.. eddie's married.. i'm goin in army soon..

i'm starting 1 let d fact sink in tt i'm not getting ani younger.. time is so moving WAYYYYYY fast quickly.. i still dun feel 18 lor.. wa lau.. still feel slightly funny getting drinks.. hahaha

seems juz lyk yest we were slacking ard in sch.. acting lyk JC life wuz gonna last 4eva.. an not caring wat stupid econs hw wuz there 4 us 2 do.. while cramming 4 lit.. hahaha makes me smile evrytime i tink abt it lor.. hahaha.. damn i miss those daes.. hahaha

hmmmm memories.. wat 2 do.. pass so fast.. then when it's gone u're lyk.. dammit! realli wish 4 those daes baq again.. hahaha

all leaving 1 by 1 off 2 dif places alreadi..

all those i tot were young kids all growing up alreadi.. (still keep tinking ben's still in ACS.. hhahaha =P)

haiz* i admit it.. makes me feel lonely sometimes..

but tings hav 2 move on.. time has 2 take it's course..

an i noe we'll alwaes keep in touch..

2 all those hu played a part in my life..

thnx a damn hell lot..

i hav d perfect life thnx 2 u ppl..

u noe hu u guys r..

u mean a damn damn damn lot 2 me!

hope we dun drift off.. hahaha..

yest wuz totally great.. so wuz today's lunch..

special highlights of d past 2 daes:

*sulyn totally surprising me by coming over early*
*sharing sake*
*hanging out ard d merlion at nite*
*juz being together*

rock on ppl! thnx 4 all d memories!

ok out of psuedo-depression.. hahaah saw this on sulyn's blog, here's my shot at trying 2 be remembered

things u shld noe abt me.. if u realli wanna noe.


7 things tt scare me

1. going crazy
2. losing ppl i care abt
3. failing
4. roaches
5. geckos
6. amphibians (smily shits!)
7. dying a slow an painful death

7 things i like

1. all kinds of food! (esp value 4 $ 1s)
2. furry cute animals
   
3. jamming
4. reading
5. spending time wit frens
6. beer
7. kids/babies

7 most impt things in my room

1. sulyn's gifts
   
2. drumset
3. my bed an d stuff on it.
4. laptop
5. speaker set
6. table 2 dump my stuff
7. clothes

7 random facts abt me

1. i slp wit a blanket covering my whole body. it comforts me.
2. my body clock wakes me aft 6-7 hrs of slp.
3. i dun watch much tv.
4. i brush my teeth aft breakfast
5. i lyk gloomy bear
6. 1 of my best frens in sec sch wuz a ger.
   
7. mostly patitient an non-confrontational

7 things i plan 2 do b4 i die

1. marry sulyn
2. travel
3. do gigs
4. serve more in church
5. improve my guitar
6. sit 1st class in an aeroplane
7. have a good job wit education

7 things i can do

1. play the drums
2. basic guitar
3. eat alot
4. play squash
5. socialize quite well
6. laugh at myself
7. cook an assortment of egg dishes

7 things i can't do

1. go 1 dae witout communicating wit sulyn
   
2. cook much else otr than egg dishes
3. concentrate 4 long
4. do pullups
5. speak dialect
6. dance
7. speak in tongues

7 words i say the most

1. hahaha
2. okok
3. whee!
4. gross
5. damn
6. shit
7. oops
   

all of us are obsessed.

this obsession is the basis of many things tt exist today.

things we speak, things we do, write, all.. to feed this ever present desire.

why else would we desire to be the best, most vocal, most talented, most wise person.

it goes beyond pride, because i belive pride is a result of this, and is but weak.

we r ALL insecure, ALL scared, of 1 main thing..


to be remembered

thus we try 2 do evryting, mostly unknowingly, to have this idea, tt we have left a mark in society, in the world, and in the space of ppl's hearts, tt we will b cherished in people's memories 4 generations to come.

everyone, all obsessed.

fearful of being forgotten

we use blogs, graffiti, clothes, music to attempt to leave a mark.

life is damn short, but noes, mayb ur memory will last long aft u.

mayb tt explains suicides, can't find ur space in the physical world, therefore u leave a mark in memory, by doing something tt makes ppl sit up an take notice.

ur non-existance will ensure tt u r alwaes ard in memory.

mayb we're all crazy.

those tt succeed, do so unwittingly, by being themselves, ensure a respected place in history, and the minds of otrs.

but those tt fight 4 it, try an grab it forcefully, onli loses all, like sand slipping through ur fingers.
or r remembered 4 d wrong tings, cuz falsity nevers stands d test of time.

there is nth new under the sun

i admit it!

i'm a closet maple player..

somehow tt seems 2 ring off worst than a closet gay.. hahaha

i told evry1 i wld stop playing aft d A's..

but guess wat..

i stil m playing it.. feeling weird cuz i somehow feel powerful an proud tt my character has over 100k and does a considerable amt of damage.. cuz i read a walkthru!

ah!!

wat did i do 2dae?

wakeup, on com/maple, eat crappy food..

prac drums..

play maple evrytime i got tired..

played drums evrytime i needed 2 heal.

at least i went out 2 meet lau.. an had drum lessons.

ah!

i'm ashamed of my addiction.. hahaa

on d plus side.. constant drum lessons r driving me 2 improve.. with much pain.. hahaha

DUN START PPL!

*WAILS TO HIGH HEAVENS*

gd ting i'm going out tml. hahaha

*sings corrine may's "save me"*